We are embarking upon our second Christmas in Colorado. I have managed to have all Christmas gifts bought and wrapped as of yesterday. Matching Christmas jammies have been purchased for the children and the house is completely decorated with Christmas cheer. I must add that even my two bathrooms and one powder room have Christmas decorations, all Martha Stewartly complete on the day after Thanksgiving.
We are hosting a party on the 13th. I searched cookbooks all of last night in hopes of discovering the perfect appetizers to serve the six parents and eight children that have been invited. What goes well with the mini wieners bathed in BBQ sauce that Miss Anne is bringing? How am I going to prevent the children from wiping their grubby little hands on my white walls and white carpet? Should I run to Cosco and see if there is something prepared that I can simply pop in the oven and say is my own? Should I come up with a Christmas craft for the kids to do at some point during the party like decorating sugar cookies or making an ornament?
Why the f*ck does Christmas have to be about the damn children?
God love them.
I do love my children and my friend's children. They're all adorable, incredibly bright, and creative. They say the funniest things and make me smile when it's a day I don't think it's possible to even utter a happy word.
But wouldn't it be nice to have a Christmas party with wine, Gourmet Magazine inspired appetizers that don't drip, and jazz music in Christmas theme humming in the background? I yearn for candles flickering at waist level, not above our heads so that children don't burn themselves with hot wax or flame.
Why can't I have a party where the kids remain in the basement with the door closed?
I promise to be nice to them in the morning! I'll even play Thomas the Train with Grie and baby dolls with Sophie. I'll try not to say "Just a minute" for at least the first few hours of the day.
Grie will be four in January. Sophie is three in March. They're little, babies still in some ways. I try to remind myself that I was so bored on Christmas before we had them. I got teary eyed when I went to Mass on Christmas Eve and saw old high school classmates visiting from out of state, happily holding their small babies.
Will I ever have that? I would think to myself. How pleasant it would be to bring my baby in it's little velvet outfit to my grandparents' Christmas gathering on the Eve before the holiday. Everyone would want to hold the baby, everyone would want to sit next to me, and Colin and I would be beaming.
I so wanted babies.
We have had five Christmas gatherings without children, and two with in our marriage.
I was only able to beam with pride Christmas 2005 with Grie and then with Sophie and Grie in 2006. We moved six months later.
So what I am saying is that I only had children was the purpose of being gushed over on Christmas Eve.
I mean, what I am saying is that there will be plenty of Christmas parties where the kids won't even bother to make an appearance. They'll think that doing a craft is stupid and that the appetizers suck.
They'll think that I suck.
I should have enjoyed those two years with my family more and I should enjoy these times with the children at ages two and three because they won't happen again.
I will however be drinking wine and the kids are going to play in the basement, but I'll leave the door open at least.
-C
We are hosting a party on the 13th. I searched cookbooks all of last night in hopes of discovering the perfect appetizers to serve the six parents and eight children that have been invited. What goes well with the mini wieners bathed in BBQ sauce that Miss Anne is bringing? How am I going to prevent the children from wiping their grubby little hands on my white walls and white carpet? Should I run to Cosco and see if there is something prepared that I can simply pop in the oven and say is my own? Should I come up with a Christmas craft for the kids to do at some point during the party like decorating sugar cookies or making an ornament?
Why the f*ck does Christmas have to be about the damn children?
God love them.
I do love my children and my friend's children. They're all adorable, incredibly bright, and creative. They say the funniest things and make me smile when it's a day I don't think it's possible to even utter a happy word.
But wouldn't it be nice to have a Christmas party with wine, Gourmet Magazine inspired appetizers that don't drip, and jazz music in Christmas theme humming in the background? I yearn for candles flickering at waist level, not above our heads so that children don't burn themselves with hot wax or flame.
Why can't I have a party where the kids remain in the basement with the door closed?
I promise to be nice to them in the morning! I'll even play Thomas the Train with Grie and baby dolls with Sophie. I'll try not to say "Just a minute" for at least the first few hours of the day.
Grie will be four in January. Sophie is three in March. They're little, babies still in some ways. I try to remind myself that I was so bored on Christmas before we had them. I got teary eyed when I went to Mass on Christmas Eve and saw old high school classmates visiting from out of state, happily holding their small babies.
Will I ever have that? I would think to myself. How pleasant it would be to bring my baby in it's little velvet outfit to my grandparents' Christmas gathering on the Eve before the holiday. Everyone would want to hold the baby, everyone would want to sit next to me, and Colin and I would be beaming.
I so wanted babies.
We have had five Christmas gatherings without children, and two with in our marriage.
I was only able to beam with pride Christmas 2005 with Grie and then with Sophie and Grie in 2006. We moved six months later.
So what I am saying is that I only had children was the purpose of being gushed over on Christmas Eve.
I mean, what I am saying is that there will be plenty of Christmas parties where the kids won't even bother to make an appearance. They'll think that doing a craft is stupid and that the appetizers suck.
They'll think that I suck.
I should have enjoyed those two years with my family more and I should enjoy these times with the children at ages two and three because they won't happen again.
I will however be drinking wine and the kids are going to play in the basement, but I'll leave the door open at least.
-C
2 comments:
I posted a link to your blog on my blog, so don't let me down, Colleen. I expect this blog to be updated DAILY, for the sake of my entertainment. The only excuse for not keeping up, is if you are spending too much time at my house.
Oh- maybe you should hire a babysitter to stay in the basement with the kids. But not Juliana- I am using her that day.
yeah! colleen has a blog! i linked you to mine :)
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